Surviving a long distance relationship..

Hi lovelies,

Sorry I haven't posted in like forever, the stress of work has just become on top of me resulting in me just wanting to sleep all the time. Today I thought I would do a post on surviving a long distance relationship to hopefully help some other people in the same situation as I am. I've been in a long distance relationship since October 2015, so just a little bit over a year. We met on a dating site and he lives in London whilst I live in Wiltshire.

Luckily because we both work full time we have the money to be able to go and visit each other most weekends but that doesn't mean there's not time where the distance begins to affect us. Here is my top 5 tips I wish I knew a year ago..

1. Communication: Communication is key. If you don't communicate it will not work. It;s very easy to misconstrue the tone of a text message so it's important to be able to openly talk about any issues you have and anytime you feel like something is wrong in the relationship. It's important to make the other person feel important and like a priority even with the distance.

2. Make time for each other: Sometimes it is very easy to get caught up in the stresses of work and other aspects of life but it is very important to make time for each other. We find it helpful to try and call each other most nights so you get that chance to here their voice and say goodnight. We also find it helpful to try and have one day in the week where we can Skype each other and talk without any distractions.

3. Plan!!!: When you're having a bad day it's so much easier when you have something to count down the days until, whether it's just the next visit or a holiday you have planned together it's so important to have things to look forward to. Take time together to choose dates and plan activities that you both want to do together.

4. Take photos: It may sound a bit lame but photo's are memories you can keep! Take lots of photos and video's together so therefore you have something to look at and remember on a tough day to make the waiting to the next visit slightly easier.

5. Finally, remember it will get easier!!: This is the person you love more than anything and one day you will be able to be with them every single day. It may seem hard now but that day you finally move in together will be worth all of the waiting.

I hope this helps if you're deciding whether to or have recently got into a LDR. I wish you all the best.

Keep smiling.

xxxxxxxxx

Mental Health and Relationships...

Hi lovelies,

Today I wanted to write about something a little bit different - Mental health and the effect that it has on your relationships - both in terms of romantic relationships as well as relationships with family and friends.

For me making friends has always been an impossible task. As someone who has suffered from social anxiety for as long as I can remember the thought of having to go and introduce myself to someone new has always been petrifying. Don't get me wrong I have a few friends from school and thanks to the internet I have a few friends online but yeah, lets face it I'm not exactly the most popular person. I'm absolutely rubbish at 'Small talk' and tend to just end up awkwardly laughing and not being able to think of anything to say. Online I try and stay friends with people but all my internet friends just tend to end up getting bored of me and leaving anyway.

For me the hardest thing about mental health issues is trying to form romantic relationships. I'm 19 and aside from the 'oh lets hold hand in the playground' type relationships back at school I've only had two proper relationships. I've been with my current boyfriend over a year (we met online) but even now my mental health effects the relationship on a day to day basis. My depression makes me down and it makes it harder for me to show love. Anxiety makes me constantly paranoid and overly clingy, It makes me need constant reassurance and attention. It makes me get jealous to easily and makes me paranoid. It annoys my partner too much and has a couple of times bought our relationship to the breaking point.

Luckily we are pretty strong and he has some how still managed to put up with me this long but honestly it is so hard. To many people it may look like you're being rude when really you're just anxious or depressed. The littlest things can set you off and it's just so emotionally draining you just end up thinking 'whats the point' and giving up on everything'.

If I ever stop talking to you I probably think you're mad at me, or fed up of me.

I'm sorry to all of my friends who have to put up with this.

I'm trying.

Keep fighting guys, love you.

xxxx

Disneyland Paris October 2016 Trip Report...

Hi lovelies, 

Me and my boyfriend got back from our trip to Disneyland Paris a few weeks ago and after the madness of going back to work I've finally got the chance to write this...We had so much fun we're already looking to book another trip to go next November for the Christmas season!

Food; We did cafe Mickey twice the dinner the interaction was fab, breakfast not so much. The pizza was pretty nice. Character interaction was fab at dinner and the few we did see at breakfast were fab - although was a bit annoying 2/5 didn't even come to our room. We didn't have a meal plan but tbh we were so busy and Im so fussy we ended up just eating at counter service places anyway so it wouldn't be worth it! We really enjoyed Colonel Hathi's pizza place and the Casey's hotdogs are to die for! 

Hotel; Santa Fe is lovely, the breakfast was fine we had crossiants with nutella and hot chocolates everyday! The rooms were clean and we loved the theme. The wifi worked well (priorities;)) and the the TV had Disney channels which were nice to watch in the evening. It was only a 10/15 minute walk to the park so we didn't even bother using the shuttle buses at all!

Characters; I was worried because we are both adults that we wouldn't get as much interaction but honestly the interaction is just as fab. Especially stitch and mickey and Minnie! Use EMH to meet characters because the queues are shorter. Also don't leave meets to the last day just incase - we almost didnt get to meet baloo! We met Donald and Chip and Dale in EMH, Met Mickey and Minnie in their adorable costumes at the Mickey's Box of Pumpkins, Met Daisy and Stitch at the costume corner, Pluto, Mickey, Goofy, Eeyore and Tigger at Cafe Mickey and Marie, Jack, Spiderman, Baloo, King Louie and Cheshire cat at various other meet and greets!

Disney express; It was so helpful on the way out to go straight to the park especially because our cases were so big and heavy. On the way back it took them forever to find one of our cases because the Disney express label fell off during the journey so make sure these are super secure - The people there are really helpful tho, they let us go into the room with all the cases to try and find ours.

Eurostar: super easy and really quick, on the way out it was amazing. On the way back had a bit of a struggle with some queue jumpers - please just don't be a ass. We also had a struggle because people filled up all the storage space with little cases. Please for the love of god if you have a little case but it in the overhead storage because it makes things impossible for us trying to fit large suitcases in.

Halloween; really enjoyed this season!!! Hell of a lot more than summer. A lot less busy and felt like there was more stuff going on! The weather was great, bit chilly in mornings and evenings but generally lovely. Aside from the Friday the park was not busy at all. No queues longer than 20 mins except princesses - defo recommend going then! Still have the Halloween song parade stuck in my head, it was amazing!

Photopass; recommend 100%! We got all the correct photos (41 over the 5 days 10 ride photos rest meet and greets) totally worth the money and the quality is amazing! 

For dreams/parades/meets we tried to get there like 30 mins before which in this season was plenty of time!

Must do;

Disneyland park;
- Pirates of Caribbean!!! (Forever my fave ride lol)
- Peter pan (done this so many times bit still love it)
- Buzz lightyear laser blast (another one of my all time faves)
- Go see what's on at the discoveryland theatre - atm it's a pixar short film festival. We really enjoyed this and it's a nice chance to sit and rest between rides.

Studio park:
- Tram tour (again I've done this loads of times but still love it, another nice chance to sit down and enjoy)
- Cinemagique and mickey and the magician (both worth a watch! And like the other stuff nice chance to sit down hahaha)
- tower of terror (my first time of doing this, I found it scary but it's defo worth doing if you've not done before)
- Armageddon (never even notice this existed before! Has some loud noises but worth a watch!)
- Art of animation! (First time doing this, defo worth a watch if not done before!)
- ratatouille (did this twice after it being broken last time I went - fun for all ages!)

I hope the post and the planning post I previously did will help some of you if you're planning to go, I will also try to post a haul post at some point with in the next couple of weeks because I bought waaay too much stuff!

Don't be afraid to ask me any questions you may have whether in the comments here or by tweeting me @beckythellama

I'm in the middle of uploading my daily vlogs from my trip to my Youtube channel so would really appreciate if you subscribed and checked these out - more videos coming soon!

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_uoCeDkdqeV6Jz5xmF8S7w

Hope you're having an amazing week - Stay strong!

Xxx

Mental Health Awareness Day

Hi lovelies,

Sorry I haven't posted for a while was busy away in Disney and then dying from the post Disney tiredness - Will upload a post about this soon!

Happy mental health awareness day! The day that we all work together to break the negative stigma around talking about mental health! Together we can break the silence around mental health and bring about change providing more support for people with these issues.

Just a quick reminder you are braver than you think stronger than you feel and smarter than you believe, Your mental illness does NOT define you. You can get through this. I believe in you. It will get easier one day. I promise this. Do not give up now.

Whatever you achieved today I'm so proud of you. Whether it was going out and facing your anxiety. Staying a day clean from self harm. Even just bringing around the energy to push away your depression enough to get out of bed. Little steps lead the way to changing your life for the better. You deserve help and deserve the best in life. If you didn't manage to get out of bed today I just want to remind you tomorrows another day, what may seem impossible today may become slightly easier then. Just remember to always keep fighting.

You are alive, you have a heartbeat and you have a purpose. You have a whole future ahead of you and you cannot give up now.

You deserve to be happy and i'll always be here for anyone if you need help.

I'm only a tweet away (@beckythellama)

I love you so much.

xoxoxoxox

Disneyland Paris Planning and Packing Tips October 2016..

Hi lovelies,

Both the anxiety and excitement are beginning to kick in as it's now only one day until I go to Disneyland Paris! This is my fourth time of going to Disneyland Paris after going twice when I was young with family and then going in summer last year with and old friend.

This year I'm going in October (as it's mine and my partners one year anniversary) and am very excited because this means it the Halloween season - This is also my first time of staying at a Disney Hotel!!! I booked this holiday back in February, If you're looking to book, or have already books and looking for tips check out my planning tips below;

Becky's Planning Tips!: 

Rough Planning of what to do each day

1. Look around! Don't just go for the first deal you see. Shop around a bit because it's highly likely you will be able to find somewhere cheaper than the first deal you find! On the Disneyland Paris website there are quite often deals such as a certain number of days free. 
2. Try and book as far as possible in advance - Travel is defiantly cheaper if you book it when the dates are first released and the cheap seats go very quick!
3. If you can, stay at a Disney Hotel - If you do you get Extra Magic Hours, meaning you can access the park 2 hours everyday before everyone else!
4. Decide if you need a meal plan - personally I've never had one because as a fussy eater I tend to go towards the cheaper places anyway. If you don't have a meal plan try and work out where you want to eat and make a rough list of how much it would cost so you know how much to budget *always bring more euros than you think because you will end up wanting to buy everything - Me and my partner are bring 1060 for 5 days we are there*.
5. Finally make sure you plan what you want to do!! It may sound stupid but when you get there, there is so much to do the chances are if you're only going for a few days you can't do everything. Write down a list of all the rides/meet and greets you 'cannot miss' (if you get the chance do not miss the parade and dreams *the firework show* They're so magical!) Try and make a rough plan of what you wish to do each day and try and do the stuff in the same lands at the same time so you're not criss crossing across the park all day. Also do the busiest rides at the time the parades on if you're not watching it as the queues will go right down.

That's just a few tips that hopefully will help you, especially if it's your first time of going to the park. But feel free to ask me any questions in the comments below and defiantly check out any Facebook groups in your country. In UK we have 'Disneyland Paris for Brits' and 'Disneyland Paris Chat Group for Brits' - I didn't know about these on my last trip and they're defiantly helpful! 

If you're anything like me you're not good at packing. I just cannot do it. I never know where do start or what clothes to pack or anything. But hopefully a few of the tips below will help you like they have helped me.

Becky's Packing Tips!;

1. MAKE A LIST!!!! It is the most important thing. Start the list a long time before you go so you have time to remember stuff you've forgotten and add it on (i'll attach a picture of my list below so you can see some idea of what to pack).
2. Plan outfits (so you don't end up with your whole wardrobe lol) and pack them rolled up together. On my list I wrote all the outfits I wanted to bring, when I went to pack them I rolled them up together and secured them with a hairband this means that firstly when I go to unpack I can just take the hairband off and boom outfit all together, and secondly they're not going to be all creased from being folded up.
3. Make sure you bring plug adaptors because French plugs are different to ours - if you have one it may be a good idea to bring an extension lead because then for just one French adaptor you have 4 UK plugs.
4. Pack things logically - Put all your food together, all your clothes together, tablets together, wash stuff together. Bring carrier bags!! Put all your wash stuff in a carrier bag in case anything leaks! Also bring a carrier bag to put your dirty washing in to bring home. Try and put all your documents and money in a plastic wallet in a safe place so they don't get lost.
5. Food and drink; Make sure you bring loads of snacks (I'll attach a picture of some of mine) - it's so much cheaper than buying them in the park and you will get hungry in queues. Make sure they're weather appropriate (don't bring chocolate in summer - it will make a mess). Also bring a water bottle, There are water fountains all round the park to refill it and it's so much cheaper than buying drinks all the time!

I hope this is helpful - like I said earlier please feel free to ask me any questions below or tweet me @beckythellama. Please ignore how utterly terrible the formatting is with the photo's - still trying to figure out this website! I'll probably be back next week with a DLP trip report and then a haul. Have a magical week and keep smiling.

Thank you for reading

**************

New Hair, Disney Nails and the Daily Struggles of Social Anxiety...

Hi lovelies...

This weekend I faced my fears. I got my haircut and my nails done! Many of you right now are probably thinking 'what's scary about getting your hair and nails done?? If anything that's a treat'... Well let me tell you..This is where social anxiety takes control. For me this was the first time ever of getting my nails done and the first time of getting my haircut *bar the occasionally cut by a close family friend* in over 5 years. Yes you read that right - I hadn't had my hair properly cut for 5 whole years.

Reading this sounds stupid..and believe me in my head it sounds stupid too. But the thought of having to firstly make an appointment, and then having to sit and make small talk with a human who I do not know overly well make's me feel literally sick to my stomach. But finally, I did it! I found someone who I could book via Facebook message rather then having to phone (if you to I have social anxiety try and find someone to do this - honestly makes life much easier)

The appointment was Saturday morning at 10am. I set an alarm for 8 but thanks to my anxiety I was up from 7 feeling like throwing up. The closer to 10 it got the more nervous I got resulting in shaking and sweating at the same time. When she finally arrived at my house all of the normal anxiety kicked in the struggling to speak because the lack of conversation topics, the blushing and shaking and the fiddling with absolutely anything to try and provide a distraction. Luckily for me my hairdresser was lovely, and I had my mum, sister and my boyfriend all around to support me (defo would recommend finding someone who can come to your house if you struggle with social anxiety).

Anyway, I survived!!!! I chose to get a trim, layers, thinning, and my fringe put back in and honestly my hair is so much lighter and nicer than it was before..finally hopefully it will be more controllable than it was!

Also my nails are the most adorable things ever!!!!! I tend to bite my nails when anxious so lets just say that she didn't really have much to work with but honestly the Disney look I went for really worked and makes me so so excited for my holiday to Disneyland Paris...only 7 days to go!

Thank you for reading, feel free to comment down below if there's anythings that you're scared of which you really shouldn't be! and feel free to follow me on twitter to find out when I post my next post - Probably a Disney planning and packing post!!!! @beckythellama


xoxoxoxo

Hello world...

Hello world...

Thank you for coming to visit my blog. After writing diary's for many years I thought it was time to take the plunge and start blogging in hope of making new friend's and helping other people who suffer from the same problems as me. This is going to be a place to release all the madness that goes on in my head - so please bare with me! It will include topics ranging from mental health to Disney to general lifestyle posts. So let me tell you a little bit about me..

My names Becky, I'm 19 years old and I live in Wiltshire in England. I work full time in childcare and spend most of my weekends seeing my long distance boyfriend of almost a year. I'm obsessed with anything Disney and really enjoy drawing and youtube.

My life has been a variety of highs and lows due to mental health problems appearing for as long as I can remember. Ever since I was a young I've been suffering from Social Anxiety, I'll probably do a more detailed blog post on this at some point but for those of you who don't know this means that you have an 'excessive and unreasonable fear of social situations' this means you struggle with a whole variety of things most people would find easy including paying in shops, speaking on the phone and speaking within groups of people you do not know.

Due to this anxiety as I got older I began to feel like I was different from everyone else leading to feelings of worthlessness which lead to the development of depression in around 2013. This depression on top of the anxiety caused me to drop out of sixth form after one year of A levels and then drop out of college after 6 months.

I'm happy to say now things are looking slightly more back on track after a year of counselling and then a year of being in my job and finding my partner. Although I'm still suffering with the social anxiety I've learnt how to control it better and although the depression still hits me hard on some days I've learnt that that's okay. I'm not perfect, I'm only human.

If you're still reading this I want to remind you that you too are only human. You're stronger than the negative thoughts in your head. This is not permanent and you can get through it.

You can do it. I promise.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and feel free to follow me on twitter to stay updated on when I post my next post or to have someone to talk to if you ever need any help. @beckythellama xox